Street Preacher

It happened about two weeks ago. But I can't remove it from my mind. Isn't it funny how often the experiences that mark us the most are ones that we do not seek out, but rather they find us. And, in addition, whilst they are happening we often do not realize how or how much they mark us.

Our "espirit," is a French word that means both mind and spirit/soul. I like how they don't separate the two (or three...how ever you wish to separate them in American/English paradigm). I kind of think that this place is where we collect these experiences. Maybe thats obvious. You tell me.

Also in French, they understand this idea that things happen TO them. They say: "cela m'est arrivé" or "cela m'est passé." This literally means that whatever the experience was ("cela" means the generic, but more formal "this" or "that" uh...not that you care...) it "arrived" at me, or it "came to pass to me"--thus I had no active part in the occurrence: I simply was victim or benefactor or what you will to the experience. I think it is interesting--this idea--because I don't get the feeling that our culture recognizes, sometimes, how helpless we actually are in controlling the events that shape our lives. Stuff "happens" in English, usually more often does stuff actually happens "to me." Or, maybe I'm jaded, and partial to European thought. :)

Anywayback to the main thing, right? Two weeks ago was probably the toughest finals week that has ever (hehe) "arrived at me" (although I must admit that I DID have an part in this said week's foreboding arrival, as I AM the one who actively chose to undertake so many credits). So, I was stressed and, well, you can imagine....For those of you that have been on Portland State University campus more than, say once, you probably know that people often find it a comfortable place to stage and voice their opinions.

Sometimes they are opinions simply expressed in dress. Sometimes they are at a booth, only voiced when approached by those who want more (I personally find this a bit more respectful than some other means of being heard). Sometimes they are very loud opinions. Sometimes they are very pushy "buy my newspaper" opinions. And sometimes, (oh one of my favorites) they are the"sign my petition and partake in my political agenda right now because if you don't stop and listen to my soap-box platform--who cares if you're incredibly late for class because you stopped to give someone else the time of day already, or even if you haven't--you will be a VERY BAD CITIZEN of this country in which you live! Who cares if you pay taxes" opinions. I hate those. What if I don't vote--on principle?! Besides, I'm probably your politcal worst nightmare, and how much do you really know about this topic?--and most of all WHY SHOULD I BELIEVE YOU?!!! Ah, if they only knew what crossed my mind upon encountering them. Good ol' OSPRIG in the Park Blocks.... Haha, Im amusing myself.Im actually not sure if this is how I really feel, but I rather find it purging to rant. I guess I have a point, huh?

Well, on this afore mentioned daytwo weeks ago, it  was bright, sunny and fresh. Already, this does not bode well, for this temporal state of the outdoors did not line up with my personal sensibilities of pathetic fallacy: I am of the mind that, at least on days such as, let's say Monday-Thursday on finals week, the weather should match my inner turmoil. Well, it did not. Nevertheless, I chose to study outside. Not because I wanted to enjoy the nice weather, but because someone was causing a stir in the--oh I don't know what you call it in English, but in Italian it is termed the "piazza" (which, by the way is NOT edible). I guess you could call it the "square," though it's not really shaped that way and doesn't sound as pretty. Naturally, my inner herd instinct urged me to go find out what was so exciting in the Park Blocks in front of the PSU Library.

Someone was voicing their opinions. Well, a duo of somebodies, though one of them was essentially cowering behind a sign, probably proud of his "brave" display of religious condescension (is that how you spell that?). The other was from the South--I dunno, maybe they both were--but I quickly caught the southern nuances in the more vocal man's loud discourse.

Frankly, I've had poor experiences in the past with Southern Baptists and so I'm wary of the Southern "réligieux." I'm not saying that these men were necessarily Southern Baptist, because I dont know, nor I'm I knocking the denomination, but I am saying that I'm wary. These persons voicing their opinions were overall most decidedly of the "loud" opinion category to which I previously alluded.

Ok. So, first the sign. This sign towered above this mans head in bright commercial lettering informing all of the sinners of the world, or at least of PSU, that they would BE JUDGED. Beware! It stated, All you Pot Smokers, Homosexuals, So-Called Christians (that was my personal favorite), Bahai members, Fornicators....well I'll spare you the rest--but pretty much anyone, it would seem, that did not fit the proverbial box into which, of course, everyone going to heaven should fit. I must pause here to state that Im fully aware that I may sound just as judgmental as I may accuse these characters of being, but please, bear with me.

 

Second, there have been many a Street Preacher on the campus of my school, but to be honest I've never seen any of them cause such a commotion among the student body as this particular man. In a suit, carrying a Bible (perhaps a King James Version?...), nearly perfect TBN Evangelist hair and, as I said, the southern accent to boot, this man preached the--or should I say HIS--Word of God. Once he did pause to answer his cell phone, and upon finishing his brief conversation he proceeded with his message to us. God was going to judge us, if we did not repent...etc, etc, etc. I sat momentarily mesmerized, but not necessarily in a positive way.

 

I must mention here, something about myself. I am usually an optimist: sometimes a realist, but rarely a pessimist. I do tend to assume the best about people and things and sometimes get hurt later. However, I do choose to be this way and give many people the benefit of the doubt because I expect them to do the same for me. Therefore, for me not to do such a thing for them is fundamentally hypocritical. Therefore as I typically utterly and passionately despise hypocrisy (believe me, more on that coming) I often choose to live with an optimistic mindset. I find often, too, that pessimists border on bitterness. Life was not meant to live bitterly.

 

All this to say that I had thought that the American Church had grown out of such an era of thought to which this man seemingly subscribed and was endeavoring to impart to us, his "lost" audience. I had up until now acknowledged, of course, intellectually, that there were pockets of such believers, but honestly to encounter such religious arrogance in such a fashion on my campus was disheartening.

 

A myriad of emotions arose in me. I grew up in a rather conservative community of, frankly, very dear people that by and large live lives of conviction. But I have encountered TOO conservative, I think, in my vast experience of 22 years.

 

I am a Christian. I am. I do not claim to have all of the answers and know how the entire organism of Christian Spirituality works or even if it could be called an organism, or even more (or less) what it should be called--do you catch my drift? But in the end I do subscribe to the following of the person of Jesus Christ and am committed to the discovery of what that amazing realization means. But I do also recognize that all over the world the person of Jesus Christ looks different to everyone because in the end WE ARE SUBJECTIVE BEINGS. I have seen where legalism can take you. I do believe that the Bible is God's written communication to us to aid in bridging the massive gap between us and Him that his profound and innate Holiness and our fallen nature creates. But when we begin to forget that fallen nature and succumb to diabolical pride and find that we have the edge on how God really wanted things and don't look at what the Bible ACTUALLY says and in our pride interpret anything He said in the way WE THINK that God meant it then THAT, mes amis, is legalism. I wonder, sometimes, if legalism is not the exact antithesis of God's desire to be with us.

 

I was angry. I dont know if that's wrong. This man was preaching, not necessarily heresy, but he was twisting Gods heart and words. Maybe that is heresy. This was the kind of people that drove Jesus to anger. He would destroy their commerce in the temple and call them a brood of vipers and whitewashed tombs. These are powerful words (and I am quoting the man directly) especially considering (and correct me if I'm wrong) that the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John according to my recollection never mention Jesus becoming angry except when confronted with hypocrisy and LEGALISM. I do believe there is such a thing as a modern day Pharisee.

 

Again, don't get me wrong, I don't usually mince words and I do care very much about truth and I do think that God judges. BUT HE JUDGES EVERYONE. INCLUDING STREET PREACHERS. He judges the proverbial saints AND the sinners. He will judge me, and he will reward me for good and for bad. THAT'S JUSTICE. And God is just, right?

 

I guess this is why I found this Street Preacher hypocritical--him and his sign buddy. They left out such an important detail that, according to the Bible in which they supposedly believe, God will judge everybody, including themselves. ALL MEN ARE CREATED EQUAL, therefore will be judged equally. This, and a couple of other things.

 

He was very arrogant, even in the way he talked about other religions: "Oh! I dated a Catholic girl in college once, and oh man..!..." He got into a couple of yelling matches with some of the students. I wondered if that would have happened if everyone had gotten a little more sleep that week, and if perhaps this man was a perfect outlet to unleash pent up stress. I didn't blame them. I wanted to run up and cover his mouth and tell him that he was messing up the witness (for lack of a better word) of those of us that wanted to do it the right way. Please stop!! I was yelling back at him in my mind, "It's because I attitudes like yours that I can totally see why people would see us as a bunch of weak hypocrites!" I was angry, and yeah, a little hurt.

 

And there was one last thing that bothered me, and continues, I guess to bother me about the incident. In two words: lazy evangelism. As I look over and recollect the gospels, I'm struck that, whenever Jesus actually preached to the masses, he seemed to have stuck around afterward. I get the impression that He physically touched nearly everyone who wanted and needed to be healed--loved. Thats it, He loved them. His preaching was in truth, because well, if He was God then He is truth, AND it was in love. In compassion.

 

Jesus taught, but He didn't leave it there. We also learn in the gospels that these episodes of evangelizing were incredibly taxing on Him. Thats because His method of evangelization was meeting every need of everyone He encountered there. He would then retreat with his 12 to recover.

 

This man that I witnessed evangelizing my school didn't get this. He didn't get the whole hands on part about reaching out to people. And yes, I know I've already mentioned it, but it angered me. In fact I became indignant.

 

But then, just like everytime, after the feeling of indignance (that is really my pride thinking that, really, I'M not like that), came the gentle reminder in my mind (God?...) that I was really no better than he. I despised his, naturally, his  methodology since I found it hypocritical and lazy, but Im a hypocrite, too: I have my days. My moments. Ugly moments. Horrible moments of profound and, even worse, blind hypocrisy.

 

This is humanity. The plague. Francis Schaffer was the one that said that there is nothing more ugly than an orthodoxy without understanding or compassion. I've been thinking a lot about that and I think that this is what I witnessed that day on campus, listening to the Street Preacher: orthodoxy without understanding or compassion, without love.

 

Christianity doesn't have to look like that. It wasn't meant to. We just screw it up. I know I screw it up too and its just easier for me to see others' screw ups.

 

So I guess I have two options here. I can either choose to disdain the likes of the Street Preachers in my life--the hypocrites, or I can choose to take to heart the humbling reminder that not even I in my spiritual indignance--actually I should say ESPECIALLY myself in my spiritual indignance--am immune to hypocrisy in my life.

 

I also, in witnessing this man and his sign buddy and in some other experiences, have come away with an appreciation (in a very liberal sense of the word) for why some people view Christians as uneducated and closed minded. There have been times when I have not blamed the non-believer for despising the believer. "I would too if I were in their shoes," I think to myself sometimes.

 

I really had no idea, looking back on those few minutes in the square, how much the Street Preacher would make me think. This thing, or rather person that arrived at me and changed me is so interesting. People change you, they do that. Everyone you encounter in some way leaves their mark on you and youre changed. Just as you change them. This phenomenon is nothing to be feared, I think. It hurts sometimes, but we become so often better. Iron sharpens iron I guess you could say.

 

Wow. That was LONG. If you actually read this entire thing, I'd love input. Let me know what you thinksend me a message. We'll chat maybe. Good night.